I love the concept of a bucket list. Some people hate it. For me, it keeps me in check with the things I really want to achieve in my life, and when I finally get to experience one of the things on the list, I am so hyped for it that I take it ALL in. Attending a Tony Robbins session in person has been on my bucket list for so many years, I can't even recall when or where I came across his amazing work.
When I moved to Toronto over 5 years ago, I realized somehow I was closer to my goal of seeing Tony Robbins live. Every few months, I would check on his website to see where he was appearing, but as life, work and motherhood continued, until just last month, seeing Tony Robbins was still another item on my list of to-do's.
The funny thing is that I knew he was coming to Toronto, and even thought to purchase a ticket a few months ago. Why I didn't do it in that moment is beyond me. But when I saw people posting pictures to social media last Wednesday morning from the event Tony was speaking at, I felt immense frustration and disappointment with myself. How could I let this opportunity pass by? Wasn't this something I needed to do before its too late?
Within 2 hours, I had rearranged my childcare for the day, organized a ticket, and driven myself out to The International Centre to sit on the edge of my seat amongst 6000 other people - waiting for Tony to hit the stage.
"Was it very preachy?", "Was it everything you expected from him?", "What happens once you leave the event and go back to your normal life?" - These are some of the questions I've been asked over the past week, and since I took notes ferociously, I thought it important to summarize the major aha moments that I took from my 5 hours with Tony Robbins. If you you still reading this post, I urge you to keep reading as my wish for you is to get something, even just one thing from this experience to somehow change or add something to your life...
Tony says that energy is the single most important thing on your path to success. His level of energy is something of a higher power. He did not stop talking with passion for 5 hours! And apparently he is the same over his 4-day, 50-hour long seminars! The way he claps his hands alone is a sight worth seeing - every single clap with such intent and energy.
This experience was truly everything I could have wished for, and more!
In no order of importance, here are my top 10 lessons I got from my time with the one and only Tony Robbins:
1. For things to get better, YOU gotta get better.
When Tony was 19 years old, in an attempt to really change the path that life had taken him on, he went to his first seminar by a man named Jim Rohn. Jim ended up being Tony's mentor, and if it wasn't for him, Tony wouldn't be where he is today.
Jim said that for things to change, YOU gotta change! For things to get better, YOU gotta get better. This really got me thinking: what am I doing to get better, to change myself?
Simple, yet profound.
2. Failure is NOT a lack of resources - It is a lack of resourcefulness.
If you think of some of the richest people in the world, they didn't start out with resources like money, time, people and materials! They started out with a whole bunch of resourcefulness and the ability to get the resources needed to achieve their goals. This was comforting and inspiring to me, as the excuse of not having enough money, or enough equipment simply is just that - an excuse. I want to bank more on my resourcefulness to get s**t done!
3. If you want answers, you need to ask better questions.
At this point, Tony gave us a practical exercise to do, and even I rolled my eyes a little when I heard I needed to actually do some work, but once I opened myself up to it, it wasn't as difficult or irritating as I thought it would be. It was actually exhilarating. So why don't you give it a few minutes to answer these questions - truthfully. Just write down whatever comes to mind, and then tweak it if need be. Go with it:
1. What does an extraordinary life look like for you?
2. What's prevented you from making it happen?
3. What needs to change now to make it happen?
I would be happy to share my answers to this exercise, but honestly I wrote down so much, that this blog would be way too long. Feel free to DM me @findingmomjo on IG/FB to hear more :)
4. Here is a biggie people: To achieve YOUR extraordinary life, you need to do two things:
1. Master the SCIENCE of achievement
2. Master the ART of fulfillment
When he explained each of these two points, he put great importance on the words and their exact meanings in this context. Achieving success is a science. There is a formula to reaching success in your life - all the successful people in the world have mastered that science, now you just have to work hard to implement those strategies and make it happen!
In contrast, feeling fulfilled and truly grateful for everything you have and that your life embodies is an art. It's personal to each human being, and needs to be curated, interpreted and appreciated in your own special way.
5. Trade your expectations for appreciation.
Oh, how I love this. We have all created these sky-high levels of expectations for all aspects of our lives. Perhaps it has something to do with our generation, and social media, but our expectations for this, that and the next thing is simply a waste of our energy and attention. We should rather spend that energy on appreciation and gratefulness of the littlest things. Understanding this concept, does not mean we have mastered it. This takes work - something I absolutely need to work on!
6. Three forces that lead to creation are focus, action and grace.
The power of absolute clarity and commitment is overwhelming as where focus goes, energy flows.
With massive action and effective execution of your endevours, you can create anything!
But then, Tony drilled in the concept of grace, humility and gratitude - as without this element, we will get nowhere.
These are concepts I understand, but feel they really need to be implemented in my life on a daily basis. Another thing I am now working on...
7. Success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure.
At this point, Tony delved into the incredible life story of the one and only Robin Williams. Truly one of the greatest humans of all time, he was a man who made everyone else happy, but himself. We simply must crack the code to our own fulfillment and happiness, as no matter how much money we make, or what successes we achieve, if we cannot be grateful for them and feel truly fulfilled by even the little things in our lives, we have failed.
Truth: This is the reason we started Momjo. It was our burning desire to feel fulfilled in this lifetime as people, women, and now as moms. We believed that if we were on this journey of self-discovery and self-fulfillment, other mama's out there must be to!
8. The secret to happiness is - progress.
Progress in whatever way - even the smallest little bit of progress each day will add to a happier existence. Sounds obvious, but slow and consistent progress is a hard concept for me to grasp, as I tend to want to progress in multiple areas of my life at the same time! I want it all, and I want it now. But it's simply impossible to do it all at once, and I am slowly learning that it's about prioritizing and making small steps to progressing in one or two areas.
9. Find your WHY by asking yourself the right questions.
Again, here we had personal work to do by answering these important questions.
- Why must you live in a beautiful state every single day?
- Why must you end any suffering or discomfort in your life every day?
- What are the two things that cause your daily "suffering" in your life? (After much contemplation and thought, I decided mine were Irritation and Impatience).
- What triggers these 2 feelings?
- What can you do to break the patterns of these feelings occurring?
10. 90 second rule to end your "suffering".
Here is what Tony suggests when you start to feel that uncomfortable stress and suffering that comes along when you toddler has a meltdown, when you don't see eye to eye with your colleague, when a family member irritates you with a thoughtless comment...
Acknowledge your thoughts and feelings, then LET IT GO. And then, IMMEDIATELY find something to appreciate in your life.
Looking back on these points, I feel myself sitting up straighter, with more energy in my fingers as I type. While this type of motivation may not be for everyone, I can't help but feel excitement for the path I am on while now feeling more equipped to continue my journey to finding my #momjo. I know I need to be more organized in my daily routine, I need to do more personal development by reading, watching and learning, I need to practice MUCH more gratitude, I need to work on my short- and long-term life and business goals to name just a few! It all starts with making the time for it - having no time simply cannot be an excuse any more!
My hope is that this blog post sparked something in you to feel inspired to progress. What area of your life would you like to master? I would love to hear and share...
For some more Tony Robbins resources - check these out:
Netflix Documentary - I'm not your guru
Guided Meditation/Priming Routine